Ivy Chopped Salad; Or, Holy F*$%

Just a quick one today, even though it’s technically two recipes. I love when this happens. Today is My Ivy Chopped Salad (which begs the question: as the only recipe specifically beginning with “my,” are all the other recipes not hers? Then why does this cookbook even exist?) and Balsamic & Lime Vinaigrette.

I started with the vinaigrette, which was extremely easy, especially since I already had all the ingredients on hand: balsamic vinegar, agave nectar, lime juice, and olive oil. I love when this sort of stuff counts as a “recipe.” The finished vinaigrette was set aside, as I got a beet boiling. One lonely beet, boiling away on the stove for half an hour, slowly bleeding into the water. It was sort of a depressing sight, to be honest.

But things quickly became sexual, as my next act was to slather an ear of corn, a few scallions, and a zucchini in olive oil. Greasing an ear of corn and a zucchini — rubbing them up and down, stroking every inch of surface — can be quite an awkward experience, let me tell you. Not for the kids, this recipe. (Gwyneth actually says in the introduction that she likes to make this salad for herself after the kids go to bed. I see why.)

Grilling some perverted vegetables.

I then heated up my grill pan, and grilled the greased-up vegetables, along with a salmon fillet. After that, it was just a matter of waiting. Once everything was cooked through, I tore up a head of butter lettuce and topped it with torn basil and cilantro, as well as grape tomatoes. I then diced the beet, zucchini, and scallions, and cut the corn off of the cob. Finally, I topped the whole pile with pieces of the salmon, and drizzled the dressing over the top.

And that, my friends, is Gwyneth’s Ivy chopped salad. And HOLY CRAP I loved it. No joke, this might have been the best recipe I’ve cooked yet: simple, cheap, relatively fast, and fucking delicious. I wolfed it down and immediately ate a second one, and now I’m sad there are no leftovers today. The combination of sweet and sour in the dressing went perfectly with the meatiness of the grilled veggies and fish, and the whole thing was just…. uggghhhhh so good. It’s going to be hard to top this one.